Some damn Netflix or IMDb review of some movie that I liked in the last year or so specifically recommended a film called
The Draughtsman's Contract. As per my usual, I decided to see it mostly on a whim, preferring not to know too much about it before I saw it. The DVD arrived yesterday.
Sometimes, at a party or something, you'll meet someone who's definitely attractive, quite attractice, and also quite distinctive. Not
generically attractive, certainly, but quite compelling. And even brief conversation will reveal that they're intriguing, too. But also that they're crazy. And at some point you have to decide if they're worth the effort to get to know better. How deep is that craziness, and how tiresome? How interesting will they actually turn out to be if you make the extra effort, and how much extra effort will it take?
Peter Greenaway movies are like that.
The Draughtsman's Contract is a Greenaway movie. It's easy to describe it so that it sounds intiguing. Staged like a play, it's a decameronish tale of a cast of Jacobean characters, mostly nobility, who dress like Monty Python caricatures and talk like they fell out of Moliere. A draughtsman is hired to make several drawings of an estate; his price is an equal number of sexual favors from the lady of the house. The woman's daughter has a devilish plan of her own. There's also a living statue that most of the characters apparently can't see, and so on. A car is visible at one point. Yadda yadda.
Thing is, this film didn't seem to me worth more than maybe twenty minutes' conversation at the party.
The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover, OK, worth more trouble, possibly mostly because of Helen Mirren and my inability to tell how seriously I was meant to take it. I've seen pieces of
Prospero's Books, which I'm not sure really pays off but is pretty damned hypnotic, and
8.5 Women, which did nothing for me, and most of
The Pillow Book, which has Vivian Wu naked (nice) and also a full-on hog shot of Young Kenobi (which I didn't need but it doesn't kill me, either).
Greenaway is probably too clever for his own good. Still, he seems to like what he does, and unlike a lot of
artistes he manages to make a lot of movies, which for some reason I feel is a point in his favor. To me,
Draughtsman's Contract was like an incredibly dull episode of
Serie Rose (aka
Softly, From Paris) with pretty much all the sex scenes cut out.
AND of course now I have no idea WTF film I saw and liked that had the review that likened it to this film. Seriously, it's making me slightly crazy, but I looked through my own reviews and Netflix history, and I have not the slightest idea.