Bizarre Confessions

General => General Discussion => Topic started by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on January 29, 2014, 07:27:52 PM

Title: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on January 29, 2014, 07:27:52 PM
Ambrosia started out as a hardcore prog-rock band.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on January 29, 2014, 08:53:21 PM
I actually said to my new subordinate at work today, without irony, "I am looking forward to completing your training."
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on January 30, 2014, 09:56:47 AM
Yes, my lord. 
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on January 30, 2014, 09:20:56 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: the other andrea on February 06, 2014, 01:49:21 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on April 13, 2014, 10:28:43 PM
Wife celebrated Passover with her family tonight. I stayed home, and just to be perverse, had Chinese for dinner.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on April 14, 2014, 09:59:17 AM
The thing about Jewish food is, an hour later you're still Jewish.



I'm still working on that joke.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on April 15, 2014, 01:41:58 AM
I just pass over jokes like that.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on April 16, 2014, 08:12:06 PM
I think that was the worst pun that jew have ever made.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: pdrake on April 16, 2014, 10:52:59 PM
they sader wurst puns are often the most basic
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on April 17, 2014, 10:41:16 AM
Worst pun I've made shofar.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on May 13, 2014, 04:16:23 PM
http://www.gingersoftware.com/proofreading-rephrase-for-app Try using the first example.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: mo on May 13, 2014, 04:22:56 PM
The beauty of their scheme is that their customers will never know.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: TFJ on May 13, 2014, 04:36:02 PM
Dag gone yer hide!
Dog gone your head!

Dog got your head!
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on July 07, 2014, 11:46:21 PM
I think I put too much activated charcoal in the filter for the cats' fountain last time. There was black mildew on the carbon. :sick:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on July 08, 2014, 10:05:11 AM
Dag gone yer hide!
Dog gone your head!

Dog got your head!

:wyh:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on July 08, 2014, 02:54:57 PM
Quote
I think I put too much activated charcoal in the filter for the cats' fountain last time. There was black mildew on the carbon.

Wow.  But . . . are you sure it isn't carbon dust?  I've seen lots of carbon dust result, but I don't think I've seen mildew on a carbon filter.

Of course, now I'm going to be paranoid about it . . . .
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on July 08, 2014, 03:03:44 PM
I didn't subject it to lab analysis, but there were sticky clumps at top and bottom, and black ick at the waterline. I'd twisted my ankle Friday night and was lazy for a few days - probably too many, but that fountain is as far from the kitchen as can be going within the house.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on July 08, 2014, 03:23:54 PM
When in doubt, nuke it from orbit.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: pdrake on July 09, 2014, 03:07:13 PM
watched the pompeii leg of running with the bulls last night.

i think i'd rather not ever do that.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on July 09, 2014, 03:09:15 PM
I don't really enjoy running without being chased by bulls.  I really don't see the appeal.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on September 02, 2014, 11:18:59 PM
When the fan is blowing and there's that one hair that flaps in the breeze, while none of the other surrounding it are moving, and you feel like taking a razor to the whole kit and kaboodle, and then you suddenly realize there's no actual verb to the sentence.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: phyre on September 11, 2014, 12:34:05 PM
phyre's axiom of users blaming IT: The visible face is the one that gets punched.

Which means, of course, that it doesn't matter which IT team or member was actually responsible for the problem; the person the user spoke to is the one that gets the blame.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on September 11, 2014, 08:42:58 PM
We have a client who refuses to use antivirus.  Yes.  Seriously.  :rolleyes:

They are constantly mad at us for how much downtime their users have while we're cleaning malware off of their machines.  They also keep getting put on blacklists because of workstations that get infected with shit that makes them spam botnet relays.  They get REALLY mad at us about that. 

We're their IT vendor.  We get ALL THE BLAME.

This is basically equivalent to someone who keeps throwing lit cigarettes on his own carpet, and then getting mad at the fire department because his house keeps catching on fire.  :whatever:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: phyre on September 12, 2014, 08:37:01 AM
I'd be really curious to hear their justification for omitting antivirus protection.

I mean, doesn't that kind of action make them legally liable for any customer data they lose? That's the kind of thing that could ruin their business, in more ways than one.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on September 12, 2014, 12:38:39 PM
Munchausen by Proxy Server.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: phyre on September 12, 2014, 12:58:04 PM
<takes a bite> wait... is that... chocolate? ... in a zucchini bread muffin?

<holds muffin up to the light> Well I'll be damned. That's a chocolate chip in there. That's one of the best ideas ever.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on September 12, 2014, 08:07:05 PM
Munchausen by Proxy Server.

:spittake: :lol:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on September 15, 2014, 10:01:24 PM
Google Image Search for "The Homosexual Nose":

(http://conservbyte.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/hillary-clinton-benghazi-300x204.jpg)
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on September 15, 2014, 10:43:17 PM
OK. That's fine. But we have to know WHY YOU WERE GOOGLING THAT
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on September 15, 2014, 10:49:14 PM
Munchausen by Proxy Server.

:spittake: :lol:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/thesaurus.php?term=munchausen+by+proxy+server
Nope. That's not really Munchausen's, as I understand the medical term. It's something for me to play with in my head - and in somebody else's, too!
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on September 15, 2014, 10:50:27 PM
Nose? Homosexual? Uh... yeah.  :knotty: I'm curious, too.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on September 16, 2014, 12:19:51 AM
It's when one nose is attracted to a nose of the same kind.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on September 16, 2014, 07:00:44 AM
It was a phrase that resulted in chat last night in a discussion about Tom Cruise. The way things do. :lol:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: phyre on September 16, 2014, 09:25:18 AM
Google Image Search for "The Homosexual Nose":

(http://conservbyte.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/hillary-clinton-benghazi-300x204.jpg)

Didn't find it. Did find a bunch of pictures of the front end of the Enola Gay.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on September 16, 2014, 11:25:21 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/6ZHqhfs.jpg)
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on September 16, 2014, 10:14:10 PM
Google Image Search for "The Homosexual Nose":

(http://conservbyte.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/hillary-clinton-benghazi-300x204.jpg)

Didn't find it. Did find a bunch of pictures of the front end of the Enola Gay.

You have to use quotes (https://www.google.com/search?safe=off&site=&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=1366&bih=657&q=%22The+Homosexual+Nose%22&oq=%22The+Homosexual+Nose%22&gs_l=img.3...1073.4552.0.4836.21.15.0.0.0.0.472.2250.2-4j1j2.7.0....0...1ac.1.53.img..15.6.2038.6nR9aTnHn2M).  It's the only result.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: phyre on September 17, 2014, 08:30:40 AM
Ah, so I see.  :hmm:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on October 02, 2014, 09:30:50 AM
Rich people won't kill the rest of us off until there are really good robots.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on October 02, 2014, 12:08:42 PM
:clap:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on October 02, 2014, 08:03:12 PM
:clap:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on October 08, 2014, 11:16:46 AM
Why can't cables be sexually ambiguous?
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: pdrake on October 08, 2014, 12:16:38 PM
they are if you cut them in the middle with clippers.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on October 08, 2014, 02:17:09 PM
Seriously, the whole male/female cable end thing is just bad design.  For some kinds of cables, like extension cords, it probably makes some sense.  For things like USB and whatnot, no.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on October 09, 2014, 08:37:37 PM
they are if you cut them in the middle with clippers.

This applies to people, too.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on October 10, 2014, 09:38:27 AM
There's that . . . what, North African? I forget . . . creation story where people used to be double, face to face, joined at the groin, but a god cut them in half down the middle.  That left an opening on each, so they were given a piece of rawhide to sew themselves up.  The dude used big stitches and had a dangling piece of rawhide left over, while the woman used small stitches and ran out early, so she's always trying to get him to lend her his leftover piece.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on October 13, 2014, 07:25:10 PM
Randy Newman's misquoted so often. It's "I Loathe L A".
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on October 14, 2014, 09:33:57 AM
He lives well over a hundred miles inland from LA.  That should tell you something.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on October 15, 2014, 06:29:50 PM
Mavericks broke my Gimp
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: mo on October 16, 2014, 06:17:03 AM
You're lucky if that's all it broke.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on October 16, 2014, 08:53:47 AM
You're lucky if that's all it broke.

So far ...
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: mo on October 16, 2014, 09:46:21 AM
It should be all patched up now, except for the "improvements"  :rolleyes:

I would recommend sending yourself a few emails through whatever setups you have, just to make sure you get them, and get notification when they arrive.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: pdrake on October 16, 2014, 11:24:04 AM
i still haven't upgraded.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on October 16, 2014, 11:26:40 AM
I was thinking GIMP was some sort of oceanography equipment and you were off the coast of Half Moon Bay..
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on October 16, 2014, 11:29:38 AM
Mom was gimpy until she had her knee replaced. I'd show you the image but I haven't enhanced it yet.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: mo on October 16, 2014, 06:29:42 PM
i still haven't upgraded.

Yeah, I can't think of any reason to, but I may be forgetting something.

The next one is coming soon, Yosemite, and I don't know what to do. Maybe it will fix my machine, or maybe it will totally kill it.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on October 16, 2014, 06:45:09 PM
Mavericks and Yosemite?  Mystery Spot sounds like a good next one.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: mo on October 16, 2014, 07:51:30 PM
Oh weird. Speak of the devil. It was released today.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on October 16, 2014, 07:55:59 PM
Mavericks and Yosemite?  Mystery Spot sounds like a good next one.

OS X Big Basin


OS X Yreka


OS X Weed
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: mo on October 17, 2014, 08:09:15 AM
If interested, ars has a thorough write-up on the changes (http://arstechnica.com/apple/2014/10/os-x-10-10/), and a slideshow showing the GUI changes (http://arstechnica.com/apple/2014/10/a-visual-tour-of-os-x-yosemites-changes/).

I think Axe would approve the direction they're going with the GUI. It's starting to grow on me. I hated it when I first saw previews a few months ago.

Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on October 17, 2014, 10:14:53 AM
I don't need the Dock, so I'd prefer if you can turn it off entirely.  Otherwise, if it has really good keyboard support and can be run on non-expensive hardware, we can talk.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on October 17, 2014, 11:28:02 AM
Mavericks and Yosemite?  Mystery Spot sounds like a good next one.

OS X Big Basin


OS X Yreka


OS X Weed

29 Palms

Death Valley

Disneyland (after Apple buys Disney)

oh wait I have the perfect version:

Needles   8/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/>
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: pdrake on October 17, 2014, 11:42:15 AM
great, now i can check my schedule for the day, my emails, my stocks and amber alerts while waiting for my adobe software to restart after it crashed.

they need a professional level OS that passes over all the GUI bullshit and works with professional level software packages. i don't give a shit about dark mode.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on November 26, 2014, 11:47:59 AM
I AM SO MYSTERIOUS DON'T QUESTION IT
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on July 18, 2015, 09:42:10 AM
All I can say about this is that if you praise seafood tacos you are not allowed to criticize pineapple on pizza.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on July 18, 2015, 10:31:57 AM
I love fish tacos but they always seem to come with cabbage, which I hate.  So I feel I should be able to be a least moderately critical of pineapple on pizza.  :hmm:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on July 18, 2015, 11:39:05 AM
Cabbage and fish in a taco.  Why not add peanut butter and Cheetos?
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on July 20, 2015, 12:29:07 PM
Peanut butter and Cheetos tacos are awesome.  Don't knock it.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Talix on July 21, 2015, 12:22:38 PM
All I can say about this is that if you praise seafood tacos you are not allowed to criticize pineapple on pizza.

I had a lovely seafood burrito? enchilada? whichever - this weekend.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on July 21, 2015, 12:27:11 PM
I don't criticize wasabi on pizza, I just don't eat a slice of it. :shrug:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on October 28, 2015, 03:32:50 PM
http://www.lacma.org/rainroom#about

It sounds to me like a metaphor for a human created desert, a place lost to the hope of water. While I think it's perfect for Los Angeles, I can go get depressed watching the mastodons in the tar pit next door for free.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on October 28, 2015, 06:30:44 PM
Oh so it rains everywhere in the room except where you are? That's damned appropriate.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on October 28, 2015, 06:34:06 PM
Imagine what Gene Kelly could have filmed in that room.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on October 29, 2015, 11:04:27 AM
It would have been an interesting follow-up to Singing in the Rain. It sounds like the sound, darkness and moisture in the air affects people and that's the positive part of the experience. Trust me to see the downside of it.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: pdrake on November 05, 2015, 12:33:30 AM
tenenet should be the goddess all fathers pray to.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on November 13, 2015, 11:23:19 PM
http://www.vam.ac.uk/content/articles/0-9/1940s-knitting-patterns/

Came across it on Tumblr.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Dr. Leonard HmofCoy on December 09, 2015, 11:50:10 AM
That wasn't a christmas card from my cousin, it was my aunt's obit
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on December 10, 2015, 07:48:12 PM
(http://36.media.tumblr.com/4357dec950ee705782051b033287f9bf/tumblr_nn30l8NTdX1tnfy3eo2_r1_1280.jpg)
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: stormneedle on December 23, 2015, 11:51:17 AM
http://mlkshk.com/p/16ZNR
Obituary of somebody that dreamt in code.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: mo on December 23, 2015, 05:13:07 PM
I knew a guy named Fink that worked for Dell  :hmm:
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on January 13, 2016, 10:58:02 AM
This morning, when I awoke, apropos of nothing and out of the blue it occurred to me (a little late, I might add) that the name of the groundbreaking 3D early-80s arcade game Zaxxon must be a reference to a z-axon, which is to say an axial point of the Z axis (being the third axis after X and Y).

I'm not looking it up, in case the internet / world disagrees with me.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on January 13, 2016, 03:21:59 PM
I subscribe to your explanation.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: pdrake on January 13, 2016, 07:16:43 PM
At the time of its release, Zaxxon was unique as it was the first game to employ axonometric projection, which lent its name to the game (AXXON from AXONometric projection).

i loved that game.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: Sidious on December 03, 2016, 11:58:08 PM
http://randar.com/post/153944009804/movie-posters-from-ghana
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: random axe on December 04, 2016, 12:03:55 PM
Very nice.
Title: Re: Non Sequitur MMXIV
Post by: flipper on December 05, 2016, 01:47:22 AM
http://randar.com/post/153944009804/movie-posters-from-ghana

Funny I get the message
Quote
This site canít be reached

I hope the link is not a ghana... / :hisey: