Author Topic: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008  (Read 2184 times)

Dr. Leonard HmofCoy

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Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« on: September 05, 2008, 01:00:24 PM »
I don't know if you recall but before the '04 erection I did a post on "likely bush voters in my neighborhood" or something like that, dividing each group up into categories, providing an identification guide, and explaining their motivations. When we last saw these people, they were busily scraping the "W" stickers off their cars. Let's have an update, shall we?!

  • The Old, Well-off Ones: Have voted for every Republican since Eisenhower. Are not going to change. The good news: there's fewer of them this time. The sad news: Those that are left are probably having bad dreams about Zombie Franklin Roosevelt rising from the dead and taking away their Buick and resettling People of Color onto their block.
  • The Wannabee Magnates: These came in a couple categories: the Real Estate Whiz Kids and the Techno-NotGeniuses. They had in common a desire to not pay any taxes nor do any work. Lived in Mom's house and constantly changed their BMWs. The good news: They are gone without a trace. No sign of these guys anyhere in town. The bad news: They seem to have sold their Bentleys and 7-series Beemers to drug dealers or gang chieftains, who seem to be doing just fine (but are less likely to vote Republican, but you never know; those people could also use a tax cut).
  • The Survivalist Gun Nuts: There never were many of these, and now there aren't as many. Some have been lately convicted of arson, or taking potshots at Volvos on the freeway. The bad news: wasn't life sentences. The good news: the remainder are going to either vote Barr or write in Ron Paul.
  • The Internal Combustion Families: The worst of the bunch, and the most numerous. They had some bad moments there, and you will not see a political sticker on their F-250, nor on their Suburban, nor their boat, nor their Jet-Skis, nor their ATVs or dirt bikes; and attendance at the local mega-quasi-baptist churches (who cater pretty much exclusively to these people assuming they're white) is down. However, the gas crisis seems to have shocked them out of their stupor, and has given them something to rally around. They're under attack! By evil libruls! Trying to take away their All American Way of Life and make them sort recycling and not throw their trash on the beach and to listen to something other than slick jingoistic fake country music! The good news: there is no good news. The bad news: Palin is (obviously) One Of Them, and might get them back to the polls. It's a bad sign. There's a lot of them, and they breed fast (like the Palins). I was hoping for $4/gal gas to stick around for long enough to put the fear of Bob in them, but no luck. I bet it'll be back down to $3 by November and these people will all be on board for the election.
« Last Edit: September 05, 2008, 01:02:40 PM by Dr. Peter Venkhmof »
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whidB

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Re: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2008, 01:39:30 PM »
So, like that takes up half the country...? :whatever:

Dr. Leonard HmofCoy

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Re: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2008, 01:47:25 PM »
"Parasitic wasps laying eggs in other insects is a better love story than Twilight." - :bitzero:
"Anyhow, it was the best sentient food movie since Killer Tomatoes Eat France." - :flipper:
"lee marvin in drag is no way to spread the gospel, son." - TFJ
"It failed. My enemies have been purged." - Sidious
"It's not like there was ever a time I didn't think Rudy Giuliani was a smug gibbering imbecile." - random axe
"*drags taint* Oh cool, I didn't know you could do that." - mo.d

NexR

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Re: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2008, 01:51:02 PM »
So, like that takes up half the country...? :whatever:

Half the voting country.
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Re: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2008, 06:18:00 PM »
Yeah, if you add a heavy dose of Jesus to the Internal Combustion Family description, that's pretty close to half I'd say.


Sidious

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Re: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« Reply #5 on: September 08, 2008, 03:49:35 PM »
Yeah, if you add a heavy dose of Jesus to the Internal Combustion Family description, that's pretty close to half I'd say.



And that demographic describes about 3/4 of the population of the little town in which I live.
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Dr. Leonard HmofCoy

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Re: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« Reply #6 on: October 08, 2008, 01:55:27 PM »
I have to say the whole arrival-of-Palin onto the scene has emboldened some of the Internal Combustion Families and there are a few McCain signs and bumper stickers up now where there were none before.
"Parasitic wasps laying eggs in other insects is a better love story than Twilight." - :bitzero:
"Anyhow, it was the best sentient food movie since Killer Tomatoes Eat France." - :flipper:
"lee marvin in drag is no way to spread the gospel, son." - TFJ
"It failed. My enemies have been purged." - Sidious
"It's not like there was ever a time I didn't think Rudy Giuliani was a smug gibbering imbecile." - random axe
"*drags taint* Oh cool, I didn't know you could do that." - mo.d

NexR

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Re: Profile of the Likely Bush Voters 2008
« Reply #7 on: October 08, 2008, 04:43:05 PM »
I have to say, I have always harbored a hope that the ICFs weren't actually as powerful as they were loud, and that there were still a lot more people that vote Republican that were smart enough not to fall for that bullshit.  It would seem that while at first the ICFs were all rapturously pleased with the Palin choice and noisy about it, having a typical one of them (i.e., moron) actually be on the ticket and show what they're made of has woke the rest of the voters up and they're all running for Obama.  Maybe the ICFs are truly a case of the squeeky wheel getting the grease.

This has been my hope and it seems to have been borne out.  Of course, right as that began happening, the financial mess started, so one still can't be sure... god damnit.
Shake your groove thing.